Rating: 8.8

Country: Australia

Genre: Grindcore

Record Label: Obscene Productions

Release Date: 2008

Track list:
1. intro
2. your fate
3. gore grind thrush attack
4. stuck in a rut
5. 3234
6. wipe ya fetus
7. blockhole
8. cold shower
9. mr.serious
10. hardcore fashion parade
11. baby got gunt
12. tow da line
13. wretch
14. just another breakdown
15. symphonies of slackness
16. here tis
17. frog dog
18. life me
19. toxic mind
20. wasting time and money
21. wizards sleeve

Total playing time 28:13

Band Website: Captain Cleanoff

Captain Cleanoff - Symphonies of Slackness

Hurrah! This came out about a year ago, but certainly deserves a mention. I played their self-titled EP many times, but after that I worried that they may've dried up, dissolved or disbanded not long after it (I never got round to checkin'.). Luckily, they recently brought out these Symphonies of Slackness, on the first full length Captain Cleanoff album in about twelve years of existence (although they've done splits and stuff too, all of which you ought to look into). Nothin' wrong with that of course, ‘cos they've honed their sound rather well over that stretch o' time, smoothed, tightened and supplified it ‘til it's ideal for puttin' onto a debut full length. Excellent preparation indeed!

Now, if you haven't heard them afore, Captain Cleanoff are one of many very good bands to emerge from the Australian grindcore scene, and if you like straightforward heads-down grind replete with extremely infectious riffage and skull judderin' speed then you ought to get along with this very well. No stoppity starty complexity or listless chuggery, the grindin' momentum is unbroken throughout, takin' the joys of crowd-please to a very high level of fun. I daresay that there is honestly no way you could listen to this album without at least movin' one of your appendages in some sort of rhythmical fashion to at least a handful of its songs. If there is then pah! In the words of Rabelais, ‘A turd for you!'

Now, what with it bein' immediately accessible (as grind goes anyway), many readin' this might see it as a pile of predictable riffs, cheezy hooks and obvious vox. Granted, the riffs are easy to follow, you know when the more intense percussive sections are about to kick in, the thing is instantly noddable, but to me these characteristics are often exactly what a good grindcore song make!! So here, made for me and othersuch like-minded twat-faces, is an album full of such compositions!

If you'd like to know to whom they sound akin, all you have to do it tap onto their MySpace and look at the extensive influences panel, but to save you the bother, I'll pick out for you those of which are (to these daft ears) the most instantly recognizable from in amongst this filth. Classick stuff from off of Earache, such as Terrorizer and of course Napalm Death can be heard very easily indeed, and Brutal Truth too, as well as key Relapse shits such as Carnivorous Erection by Regurgitate, favourite bits of Inhale/Exhale and Human 2.0 by Nasum. With regard to their Australian brethren, there's a bit of older Blood Duster here, some Fuck…I'm Dead, and some others I can't pick out right now.

The guitar, in gutchurnin' sort of tunin' (even though I play a bit, I'm afraid I'm clueless when it comes to actual tunin' specifications, so I can't really say owt about that) wrenches out many very catchy riffs, nothin' too complex or virtuosic, just highly memorable sequences performed with much spirited vim and in a well oiled fashion. Generally, the guitars are comin' out with pretty standard grind fodder, the sound of which you will all have heard many, many times before, but it originality isn't the key there, it's more the unstoppable thrust with which it flows along, builds up, breaks down; catchy crustified part into fast whirry section, big palmed muted segment followed by groovy kick-in, then a stabbity bit, a slab of slightly slower breath-catch, then back again. Of course, these song bits are swapped and chopped and changed and picked and mixed around within each tune, they're not just playin' the same thing over and over, Captain Cleanoff play grind, not d-beat. The vox are very good indeed, usin' the classick two-way formula of hysterical, bile-soaked, throat scorchin' screams and extremely coarse, stomach strainin' gutturals. These are deployed very well indeed, with much conviction and poise, findin' a highly effective balance between the high and low pitches, swappin' from one to the other at exactly the right moment. Drumwork is just the job, not to flashy and ‘ooo look what I can do!', but not trite by any stretch of your warped imaginations. Bass? Big, warm, fuzzy, lovely!

Cover art: superb! It's a rather strikin' affair, with four different pieces created by Glenno, whose devilishly detailed works many of you will've seen alongside such names as Blood Duster, Conquest of Death, Municipal Waste, Electric Wizard, Agents of Abhorrence to name but a couple, as well as adornin' various Obscene Extreme memorabilia and paraphernalia. It's much more than just the parodical play on Symphonies of Sickness by Carcass that I would've expected given the title of the work; it's a beautifully rendered skeletal character, with fearful black wings, rottin' mouth, open throat gashed down the chest, hands out in a sorcerous gesture, with bits of red offal floatin' around, whilst on the left of that on the fold out there's a exquisite pic of a chap playin' a Captain Cleanoff zombie shoot-em-up game down the arcade, so absorbed is he by the gameplay that he doesn't see a gang of flesh eatin' characters emergin' from behind the machine, along with hideous bat-like things flyin' out, enormous grubs, but with wings, no eyes, and massive gnashers. On the reverse of the fold-out, there's an excellent piece, with lots and lots of repulsive skulls and half decomposed heads all connected together by long, curved horns, intertwined by writhin' snakes. Phew!

It's definitely got an old skool feel to it, but delivered with much more cohesion, and with a lot less lo-fi fogginess than grind we remember from back in the day. The production is very good; it's sharp and satisfying but not too buffed up, tidily presented but without losin' any important bite along the way.

Overall, very good indeed. Go get!!!!

June 30, 2009